Friday, October 03, 2008

I Don't Speak Catonese!

My cat, shown here in one of his drunken stupors… my cat Jack is driving me mental.
He meows too much in the mornings.
Let’s be serious now. It’s bad enough that I have to wake up so damn early for work every day, but to be wakened [wokened? How does one say it, exactly?...] to be MEOWED awake before the alarm goes off – No.
This is unacceptable.
And it seems to be getting worse. It’s like he is trying to SAY something.
And I don’t speak Catonese!
I get out of bed all bleary-eyed and go to the kitchen to see if his food dish or water dish is depleted. Nope. There’s stuff in each.
He just looks up at me and MEOWS plaintively.
Is this normal feline behavior?
Is there anyone out there that can translate for me?
Usual mornings go something like this… “Meow! Meowwww!”
[Pause].
Meooooooowwww!”
[Now I’m awake as hell…]
“Meow-meow, meow! MEOWWWW! Meow! Meowl. Meowmeowmeowwwwwww! Meow.”
Is he just hung-over from the night before? Is that it?
He wants some tomato juice? Another beer? WHAT!!!

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4 comments:

May said...

Seems like you have a baby boy at home, not a cat!
I'd close the cat in the cellar.

Melanie said...

My cat used to do the same and despite the fact that of course I loved him dearly, it was so bloody irritating! The only thing I could do was to tell him to be quiet in a scolding tone, but he would just laugh at me and yowl louder. (he did stop after a few months, incomprehensibly...)

Jeane said...

My cat does the exact same thing. I know why- it's because he wants to go outside - but does it have to be at five am every day, an hour before I have to rise? He's really LOUD too. One day I was really irritated by it, and it happened to be raining heavily outside. I put him out anyway- and I think he figured out I was upset. Since then he doesn't meow loudly, but makes a little "prrrup" noise which wakes me up gently, so I can let him out and stumble back to bed without being irritatingly wide awake. I don't know if I can recommend this method though, because it's really unkind to shut your cat out of the house in a rainstorm. But I was mad, and he did ask to go out.

Anonymous said...

Seriously, get a dog.
C.