Sunday, May 15, 2011

Half a Haircut

I don't know what is wrong with me lately. The only thing I haven't been "putting off" is procrastination itself!
Case in point, I've known for a while that I desperately need a haircut, and just yesterday I drove directly past my usual hair place. Brigitte has been cutting my hair for years, I don't even need to say anything to her, I just sit down and she starts snipping away.
But today I was walking past a barber shop and [inexplicably] I went in there. The girl told me that haircuts are $25, which is way more than Brigitte charges.
Yet, into the chair I went. The random hairstylist could not have been over the age of 20. I informed her that I did not want a really drastic haircut, and no sooner had I said this than she hacked off quite a substantial slab of my rug.
"Whoa, whoa, WHOA!" I ejaculated. [<-- I've been reading some Jane Austen lately.]
So, after some further instruction, she proceeded to err in the opposite extreme of things. Clearly, this was not a match made in heaven.
Where's Brigitte when I need her?
[Probably at the place where she works?]
The girl was all "Is this good enough?" but she was hardly cutting anything at all now. I was totally calm and everything but at a certain point [she had really only just begun] I said to her, "Umm, I know this is weird, but can we just stop? Seriously, I will pay you if you just stop right now and let me go."
She, a little less calmly said "Sure, no problem" as she whipped the tarp off of me.
She only charged $15 for my half a haircut, which is about what Brigitte charges for going all the way with me.
Oh well. Lesson learned. In the meantime, I look like a semi-plucked chicken.



Alyce said...

I'm sure it's not that bad - but if it is will you please share pictures? :)

BBB said...

Martin Amis talks about rug-rethink but I believe this is the first instance of rug-renege I've come across.

Cipriano said...

Alyce -- You are right, it actually wasn't all that bad, really. I was a bit hyperbolic with the "half-plucked chicken" comparison. Pictures? Hmmm... I never took any at the time -- and now, by some strange osmosis, my hair doesn't look half bad.

BBB -- Yes, when I used the term "rug" I was actually thinking of John Self in Amis's Money.
Reg-renege --> THAT IS BRILL!