"Product, product, product!"

We have all heard (and used) that phrase “Location, location, location!” have we not?
I am sure that in general matters of real estate there is great pragmatic value and relevance in the employment of those words. However, I want to suggest another important phrase….
“Product, product, product!”
Fellow Puddlers, you know by now that I spend most of my lifetime in a coffeeshop and/or bookstore. I know, I know… it’s a dream-life I am living! I am the Urban Urchin. I spend more time in the downtown core than do most actually homeless people!
I am the consummate Street Hermit of Indefinite Tenure.
[NOTE: Some people are more familiar with the abbreviated form of that title]!
Anyhoo….
OK, so here I am, I am actually even writing this from downtown. Sipping coffee at Chapters.
Thing is, half of the food I have ever consumed in the past decade has come out of the Foodcourt in the Mall across the street. I could walk around in the Foodcourt BLINDFOLDED and still get to within one or two feet of any intended destination.
All of this is the long way of saying “My God, I eat there a lot.”
Especially on weekends.
And I’ve done them all… Roasty Jack’s, A&W, Teriyaki Experience, KFC, Manchu Wok, Subway, New York Fries…
I mean, if it were not for that Foodcourt, I would have long since died of malnutrition.
Or wait a minute… maybe I am saying that wrongly…. Umm… maybe it is closer to the truth to say “Because of that Foodcourt, I will one day die of malnutrition.”
[Somehow, this latter thing may be more like it.] We will have to await the autopsy and subsequent coroner’s report, after I one day keel over ten feet from the Burger King. The official conclusion will probably be quite succinct….. “There was more grease than blood in this man’s veins!”
Anyhoo… moving onward…. lately I have been frequenting the newest addition to the plethora of carcinogenic food joints at the Mall.
Jimmy The Greek.©
It is good.
It is good stuff.
Probably, as Roberta Flack sings… it is “killing me… killing me softly,” but hey. What can I do? I gotta eat! I gotta keep the furnace stoked! I’ve got no Stepford Wife at home, clad only in an apron, quietly making me supper!
Thing is, back to my premise…. about location versus product, and all.
See, Jimmy The Greek just moved into the last stall in the long line of food joints. Sort of inconspicuous. It’s new, been there a month, if that.
Now, the thing that once occupied that space was a place called “Soup-It-Up”.
They sold soup.
SOUP!
Who in the hell really wants SOUP when you are walking through a mall?
No one does.
That is why the place is not there anymore. It went under. The soup pot ran dry. Or rather, remained too full…. of SOUP!
I remember, I used to be sitting there and looking over at the folks behind the counter of Soup-It-Up. I felt bad for them. No one was over there. A few times I went over (I really did) and I would get their “Works Baked-Potato”…. it wasn’t soup. It was an actual baked potato, but LOADED with stuff that has surely knocked a few more months off my already threatened lifespan!
So… thing is…. in comes Jimmy The Greek…. swaggering and proud.
Flashy signs. Menu staring at you in bright neon. Pictures. My God, you even want to eat the signage!
Everything looks so good. And note…… NO SOUP!
No soup is offered. The place is totally soupless.
And it is totally good food. I should know. I’ve eaten there about thirty times already!
AND THERE IS NEVER A TIME WHEN THERE IS NOT A LINEUP OF PEOPLE IN FRONT OF JIMMY THE GREEK. Hah!
Hah!
Sooooooo…. this is where my theory comes in.
It’s all about PRODUCT man!
Same location!

Think about it:
Soup Place: No paying customers whatsoever. The guy who owned that place has probably had to cut his losses and open up a bicycle repair shop or something.
Greek Place: You’ve gotta get advance tickets to ensure yourself a place in the lineup! Soon they will install those “pull-tabs” and you will have to sit there and wait until your number is called. Then you will throw your money at Jimmy, you will gladly throw it at him as he hands you that styrofoam plate, heaping with rice and tasty junk and garlic sauce and salad and whatever.

It’s all about what you’re selling!
Location shmocation!

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